I realized today, after yelling to another stranger who couldn’t even hear me, that they were “the worst kind of person”, that I’ve been saying that a lot lately. As such, I’ve compiled a list of the types of people who I actually do think are the worst kinds of people, because I think maybe not all the ones I accused are actually that bad.
- People who cut you off and then slow down. That’s the most recent person I yelled at and he didn’t even cut me off. I watched it happen to the poor person in front of me. My thing is, if you’re trying to get over, use a turn signal. If you aren’t don’t get pissy when someone doesn’t let you over. But most importantly, if you are in such a rush that you absolutely cannot wait to get over, don’t be that person! Do not cut in front of me then slow to 20 in a 45…seriously? Where was that hurry up that made getting in front of me an absolute necessity? Screw you, buddy. You truly are one of the worst kinds of people.
- People who get mad when you ask for gas money. If I’m giving you a ride and I’m strapped for cash, me giving you a ride is a favor, you shouldn’t get mad at me for asking for some help paying for the gas you’re using as well. Am I your mother? No? Then fork over at least a couple of bucks or start hoofing it, sweetheart. You are an entitled little douche and one of the worst kinds of people.
- Contrarians. So, I know this guy who hates The Beatles. He doesn’t have a legitimate reason, he just says they’re overrated. When asked to explain, he can’t. But the thing is, I know him, so I know he doesn’t like them simply because popular opinion is that they were either amazing or did amazing things for their genre. I hate when people dislike something just for the sake of being different from the norm. I hate when people like things just because the main consensus is that it sucks. Don’t get me wrong, if you have an actual opinion and you really do like/dislike something that most others do or don’t like, fine. But if you are only saying you do or don’t like something because it opposes popular opinion then I need you to stop voicing your opinions immediately because you are one of the worst kinds of people.
- People who don’t read and are smug about it. I’m a book nerd…as if you all didn’t know that already. I can’t stand when someone announces proudly to me that they don’t read books. That is not a badge of honor to be announced and waved about. On the contrary, you should be hanging your head in shame or hiding in a dark cave of willful ignorance. When you tell me you didn’t read the book, and smile, I feel embarrassed for you. And so should you, feel embarrassed, because you are one of the worst kinds of people.
- Divas. Okay, not like actually musically talented divas. No, i mean that one friend almost everyone has. You know who I’m talking about? The one who only ever wants to do what they want to do and if you aren’t doing that they won’t be there. The friend who is definitely only around in the fairest of weather. The one who also expects you to drop everything for them if they’re having a bad day, but then doesn’t understand when you’re upset they won’t do the same. Sweetheart, you are not Aretha, Tina, or Queen B, so step off your high horse and learn to be a bit less self-absorbed or you’ll forever be one of the worst kinds of people.
I’m sure there are more I’ll think of next time I’m complaining about a customer or yelling at that minivan in front of me, but for now, those are the ones I can think of. I’ve also just noticed I have a lot of rants stored up in my mind that I never get around to yelling at the people I want to, so these will probably continue to happen. Anyway, that’s all for now. Goodnight guys, and thanks for reading.