My Psych professor, whom I love, gave us an assignment recently to write a letter to ourselves 10 years in the future. At first I was like…this seems lame. But then I continued to read her assignment and I thought harder about it. She wanted us to write out our hopes and fears…to really think about where we want to be in 10 years, who we want to be. I high school I think they asked us that same question but back then…who the hell really knows who they want to be or what they want to do with the rest of their lives? Who really even understands what the rest of their lives is? It’s just some distant idea you don’t want to think about. But now, 10 years is not too hard to imagine. 31 is a real possibility, and it’s almost too real for a moment. Anyway, since I had to share with my class what I wrote, I figured I’d also share with you all:
It’s sort of weird writing to you now and hoping to impart some wisdom upon you because I’m sure you, at 31 have far surpassed what I think being wise is now. But I just hope by looking back on this or by having written this in the past maybe you took into consideration some of the things we wanted for us and tried for them…that’s all I really want for us, to try for the things that we want now, or change them and try for something else because we know who we are and we aren’t afraid to try anymore.
I hope you didn’t spend your 20s afraid. We spent so much of our life already afraid to try new things, or afraid to be too happy. I just want you to have lived a little. Not be ashamed of the mistakes we made but glad to have learned from them. And I actually hope you did make some. Our 20s should be a bit of a wild time, we are young enough to not always have to worry about responsibility, and old enough to know how to accept the consequences of our actions, so I just hope we didn’t do anything too bad.
You’re still writing right? Fighting for your dream job? Or, are we published now? Either way, as long as we didn’t give up I’m really proud of us. Did we find a job we actually like in the meantime? Because I hope by now you know it’s not work it if you wake up every morning hating your life and wishing you didn’t have to go. We deserve better, and we should have fought for better. I really hope you like where you work, I hope they appreciate all that you do for them. I hope you didn’t settle for anything unless it was reasonable.
Also, I hope we’re happy with our body. It will never be what society calls “perfect” but as long as we are confident with it I’m good with that. I hope we ar healthy and strong. I hope you did finally take that self-defense class, just because it might be good for us. And who knows, we might be cheating ourselves out of something that’s actually fun. I just want you to look in the mirror and not dislike what you see. I know you’ll always have your good days and bad days but as a whole, be proud of who we are. Nobody else sees anything wrong with us so why do we?
Most importantly, I hope we are happy. We are right? I mean, maybe not all the time, that would be impossible. But when you look at our life overall, we are happy right? We are confident and in control, heading where we want to be heading, living somewhere we like to be living? With someone who treats us well, and we treat just as well? I don’t really care if we are married or not, or if we are single. But if you are in a relationship, or even married, I hope it’s a good marriage. And if you are single, be happy being single, don’t rush anything. Do we have children? Are we a good mother? I’m scared I won’t be, I’m scared I’ll be like my mother, and wake up one morning to children who can’t wait to get away from me. Are we a good mom? All I really want is to know I can give them the best life possible. Or at least not mess everything up. I know it’s probably hard sometimes…it was never easy. But I hope we know that things do get better, and I hope we live without regret, and are happy. If nothing else, I just really hope we are happy.
21 Year Old You
So, now I ask you guys…if you could write a letter to yourselves 10 years in the future what would you say? What are your fears, your hopes, your dreams? What would you want for yourself, and what would you want for those around you?
Until next time, thanks for reading guys.